I was contacted privately by an OP of this question (now deleted).

Hi I am the same guy with as here. I found your email by googling your DN . Sorry for contacting you via email but it is really getting very difficult for me to debug the problem. Would you mind if I ask you to come over skype or something like that?

I am kind of getting desperate since its only a 6 month old phone without any warranty.


In my book, it is highly unfair seeking one on one support to resolve the issue, however, time and personal life, working etc... it is deemed unfair to put me in the spot and also unfair on the community, notice how the email sounds desperate and not being patient enough to wait for turn-around time for someone else on this site to answer, nor being patient either does not help.

Sending one on one private email should not be allowed on a community site unless contacted by way of message, or even chat, but on email... no...

What is the best course of action?


Just noticed that the OP now has supplied the answer to their own question... sigh

This from, another forum (directly quoted from Modaco), sums it up succinctly.

It is extremely rude and unfair to contact a person directly and expecting personal 1-on-1 support. They have personal lives away from the forum and this should be respected.

If you have any questions then ask them in the relevant forum thread. If you do not receive an answer straight away then wait. Sometimes it may take more than 24 hours for somebody to reply to you. If you do not find the answer you are looking for or do not get a reply then try re-wording your question giving as much information as possible. Logs are useful, screenshots are useful.

These forums are a community and by asking questions openly you are helping other members. Asking questions privately is rude and inconsiderate to ASE users, and not fair on the rest of the community.


1 Answer 1


Well, we're all public in some ways. Between all of our linked accounts if someone wants to find a personal email address or web site they're going to find it.

This is very poor etiquette by the person who emailed you. They shouldn't have done it. However, there is nothing Stack Exchange can do to prevent it, nor should the person be "punished" by Stack Exchange because of something they did off the network.

In a way, it's understandable. Very often when you're desperate to find a solution you'll grab at anything that looks like a lifeline.

Personally, I suggest to simply ignore them. Perhaps create a filter to automatically delete any messages from them in the future.

If you're kind, you might respond with something like

I'm sorry, but I can't help you. I am happy to volunteer some of my time helping the people who ask questions on Stack Exchange, but I can't possibly offer personalized help. Good luck to you.

If you're feeling snarky, you might further respond with something like

However, if you would be willing to pay my hourly rate of $150 per hour, minimum 10 hours, I can probably be convinced to help out. Of course, I would need that money up front and if this can't be done remotely you'll need to pay my airfare as well.

I wouldn't recommend that last, though. I'd just simply ignore it and twit 'em.

  • You might also suggest that they might be able to find some folks in the chat room who might be able to help them.
    – ale
    Jul 15, 2013 at 13:40
  • 2
    Cheers for that answer, yeah, I did ignore it and pointed it out in the comment. Its difficult to not come across as a mean S-o-B on one side, and on the other, to be "mother teresa" helping out ... but I lol'd at your example of a snarky response... :)
    – t0mm13b
    Jul 15, 2013 at 13:50

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